ABC of Teenagers
The A, B, C, of Teenagers
Picture the scene: your teenage daughter returns home an hour after her curfew. Before you can bawl her out, she tells you that her boyfriend has bought her a diamond. Immediately you envisage a shotgun weddingâ¦
She puts out her tongue, in what you think is her usual impertinence. Itching to slap her, you glimpse the glimmer of the solitaire replacing her stud.
Unlike in real life, the middle of the road is the safest place to be.
1. A child who is not ferried to and from ballet, football, piano, gymnastics, drama, and judo, is not be losing out even if âeverybody else is doing itâ.
2. Aggressive body language exacerbates hard feelings: keep fingers away from faces, and arms away from hips.
3. All punishment should fit the crime: grounding wonât work if teenagerâs room is a state-of-the-art haven.
4. Although it is important to feel a part of the crowd, not every teenager realises that they may be in with the wrong one.
5. Always negotiate parameters, rather fix rules: this allows for flexibility on either side.
6. Arguments make everyoneâs life a misery; do not confuse issues and keep to the subject at hand; empathy is the key.
7. Avoid nit-picking; close one eye to minor misdemeanours, and emphasise this.
8. Avoid sexist comparisons â deadlines must be given according to age, not sex.
9. Ban attitudes where a teenager, even jokingly, refers to negative behaviour, especially violence, as a solution to conflict.
10. Be alert: keep ears pricked about issuessuch as how easy it is to obtain drugs, contraceptives, cigarettes, alcohol, pornography, etc.
11. Be aware that a teenager casting a line about third parties may be gauging your reactions, if they were the ones involved.
12. Be lenient with your children; they, too, have bad hair days.
13. Behaving civilly is a must; sit down and refuse to listen to tales about anyone who is not present.
14. Being a comfort, rather than repeating I-told-you-so this tells a teenager you are his ally, not an adversary.
15. Blatant favouritism fans sibling rivalry; hold back, even if one child is your right hand and the other is downright selfish.
16. Bravado may be hiding hurt; besides, children are adept at exploiting cracks in the relationship between their parents.
17. Breathing space and privacy are indicated; avoid nagging but make it clear you are there to help
18. Bullying children into submission does not take into account that when praise is withheld, rebellion is a plea for attention.
19. Carrots like a supply of microwave popcorn and cola mean you get to meet your childrenâs friends, in a safe environment.
20. Cherish your children: watching motherhood from afar, self-styled psycho-therapists will ply you with unwarranted advice.
21. Choose your friends carefully, although you cannot choose your family; this is necessary for teenagers to comprehend.
22. Chores are an integral part life; each member of a family unit has responsibilities as well as rights.
23. Contemporaries exert peer pressure upon parents too, but only if you allow it.
24. Cry off refereeing; arguments may just be a ruse to divert your attention from more important issues.
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Source: http://www.articlealley.com/article_115351_40.html
Keywords: art haven, bad hair days, ballet
, body language, cigarettes, contraceptives, curfew, daughter returns, empathy, glimmer, glimpse, gymnastics, hard feelings, hips, impertinence, judo, misery, shotgun wedding, solitaire, teenage daughter.
